Carlos Danger Was Sexting Sydney Leathers

By Tom Z

Word to the wise, if you’re a famous politician, and a 23-year old girl wants you to send naked pictures, there’s a pretty good chance she’s a golddigging whore looking to extort you.  I’m not saying that’s always the case.  I mean, after all, my grandparents got together after Snapchatting dong pics, and that was purely out of love.  But it’s probably extortion.  That’s why I require a credit check from all girls before I send them my dong pics, to make sure they’re independently wealthy and less of a legal risk.  If only Anthony Weiner had listened to my advice, he wouldn’t be in such trouble with 23-year old Indiana resident Sydney Leathers, who by the way, has a much faker name than Carlos Danger.  From CNN:

“Sydney loved him but then she fell out of love with him because the idealized vision in which she had of him was not true, was not the case”… “She became disgusted with him after finding out that the person who she thought she was in love with was not indeed that person.”

“I hope we make some $ out of it,” she wrote. “There is not a doubt in my mind that we won’t makes (sic) thousands and thousands of dollars”

I don’t know a lot about Anthony Weiner’s policies, but even if he’s a good leader, can’t we find a guy who’s a good leader AND doesn’t send dong pics to 23-year olds?  You would think in a city of 8 million people there would be at least two choices who are competent leaders and don’t have horrible personal scandals.  But nope, that’s too much to ask apparently.  Instead you have to choose between a guy with a clean background and the personality of a sweat sock, or a charismatic leader who’s trying to fuck interns on Bang With Friends.  Since we can’t find competent people, can we just elect that “the rent is too damn high” guy?  At least when that guy has a scandal, it will be something fun, like finding out he’s actually from Neptune.

  • austin thorpey

    Funny. When american people stop judging on looks and charisma, and more on work ethic and inttegrity, regular people will step up. Until then, we get unscrupulous sociopaths who are not embarrassed by immoral actions that will show up in the news.